Another Wednesday

I don't know how it is possible, but it is week four of being a college graduate. I have a Bachelor. How lucky am I? Only a small percentage of human beings on this planet get the opportunity to do what I did and get educated at a high level and attain a degree in a profession. I guess I'm a professional designer? Hmm. Anyways, I'm still dealing with the inner emotional and mental frustrations and battles of being unemployed in this economy and job market. It is possible to go to the library too much, the gym, the pool. Everyday I wake up and have nothing to do. It is a blessing and a curse. I can relax and do things I've always wanted to do, but have had work or school. However, I'm usually on overload of ideas of what I want to do and accomplish in my free time that my brain fries and I sit on my butt. I have taken an Enneagram test and attended a class (it helps big time on people skills), and I am a 6 with a 5 wing (there are 9 total types. learn about it, it's really interesting). This means I am a thinker. I live inside my head all day everyday. I'm more mental than emotional or physical. I think too much that I just veg. Today was good because I went to design league softball and hung out with my friends on the team... out of the ordinary itinerary I have everyday of nada. This whole being unemployed is just so hard of a concept for my mind to process. I feel like I'm back in high school looking for a part time job and going to friends' houses to hang and party. It is completely out of my control and it is so frustrating. I have more ups and downs at this point in my life than I did, ever. Emotionally I am either super happy and relaxed or super sad and stressed. What a push-pull right now. I feel awful complaining because at least I finished college, but what good is it when the world won't let me do anything with it?